Coping and Adapting in Unpredictable Times
What a difference a week makes! Never in my life have I seen this more than in this past week. I've had loads of personal change that made great impacts on me from one day to the next, but never on a global scale. I think the resilience I've built up over my lifetime has made me capable of handling things though. How about you?
Everything that happens in our lives, every experience, makes us into the person we are. We learn how to operate within the world, how to respond to situations and how to cope over time. Sometimes, our ways of coping in stressful situation like that we’re in now aren’t effective. Perhaps we’ve been managing through building identities around what we do. We may have built strategies that aren’t the best, like shopping or partying, that work as temporary measures, but not right now. Maybe it’s time to learn new strategies.
Spending time alone can be extraordinarily painful for some. I saw a meme going around saying something to the tune of “Check on your extraverted friends- we are no ok right now”. It’s funny, but also true. We are social creatures and we rely on our connections to sooth the anxious feelings and talk out the stress. The truth is, this doesn’t need to stop. It’s time to make use of technology through platforms that offer video chatting. This is different than being online, emailing, texting etc. You still have the face to face contact and can have it with more than one person. Maybe you can set up a time for your usual brunch or something where you’re all in your own spaces, but together.
If you’re feeling anxious over the state of the world, turn it off. Get updates from a reliable source once a day. Government officials are providing briefings once a day. Find your local time and tune in to that and then leave it be.
Control what you can, let go of what you can’t. The Serenity Prayer in its simplicity is so profound for so many situations. If you haven’t heard it in a while this is it:
God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change
Courage to change the things I can
And wisdom to know the difference
I get how frustrating it is to hear of people who are returning from travel and what not still out in grocery stores, risking infecting more people. Can you control it? No. The frustration is all yours. It’s only affecting you, and not in a way that’s productive. It may seem weird to you, but try to offer compassion and understanding to people. What they are doing might be their own reaction to fear- straight up denial. Another coping mechanism not suitable to the day, but theirs none the less.
Keep up good habits. It’s easy to start letting go of good eating, exercise and other things that keep you well. That is not going to help manage anxiety, it will only make it worse. There are loads of people out there offerings up their services on line now. Your usual teachers and wellness experts aren’t available in person, but they might be online. Check in. Or try something different that is available online.
Being adaptable is one of the strengths available to humans. We learn quickly and can adapt when motivated. Now is the time to motivate yourself.