I am woman, hear me roar!

I am woman, hear me roarIn numbers too big to ignoreAnd I know too much to go back an' pretend'Cause I've heard it all beforeAnd I've been down there on the floorNo one's ever gonna keep me down againHelen Reddy, 1971

I was recently told a story where a man referred to women (all women) as marginalized. My first reaction to this is "I'm not marginalized!" To me, that word screams out 'victim' and I am not a victim.

There are definitely issues in our society with how women are treated differently than men. Women are overly sexualized with too much value placed on appearance (a couple of good examples of that at right). This leads some people to conclude that there is no other value in women. This message is sent to young women who internalize it and try to meet unrealistic standards. There are issues with how girls are raised vs boys. Experiments have shown that adults (even those who call themselves feminist) often push certain types of toys or play on children based on their gender. That can lead to girls growing up with little to no interest in traditionally male dominated fields. See this video for an example:

 [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWu44AqF0iI]

There is a vast difference in how women communicate in the work force in particular. I feel that this stems from being thought of as a bitch when being as direct as our male counterparts, for example. Women sometimes end up coming across as wishy-washy or weak because we've been trained to be 'ladylike' in our approaches. That means what is said is open to interpretation and our soft approach ends up being ineffectual at times - which is then interpreted as women being ineffectual or incapable in general. When we are direct - even with other women - it is often met with discomfort or even anger. And of course, women are often treated less respectfully or less intelligently than men. Case in point, would a man ever ask another man whether or not he put the clutch in on a vehicle that won't start? On a vehicle said man has been driving for years? I doubt it, but that happened with a female friend of mine.

All that said, am I marginalized because I am a woman? Am I okay with men assigning that label to me? Not really. I've worked hard, and I am quite direct and honest in business affairs. I don't really pull punches and I feel entirely capable even when I'm being thought of as a bitch. I am comfortable in my way of presenting myself to the world. Sometimes I wear makeup, mostly I don't. I dress for my own comfort, not to please anyone. I speak to men and women the same.

There are policy issues around the world that affect women in ways that men are not affected. When I look at a photo of Trump and his posse of men deciding on issues like abortion or women's reproductive rights I cringe. But I don't want to be referred to as marginalized. I don't think anyone does. People of colour have been referred to as marginalized too. It's not a good term. It means to "treat (a person, group, or concept) as insignificant or peripheral". Who wants that label? Can't we just tackle issues rather than label people?  Is labeling in this way helpful?

I'm a bit concerned that we're going too far. Every compliment is not a sexual innuendo that needs to be punished. I fear that when we start to walk on eggshells with each other we end up in a situation where sexism is pushed underground or pushed aside because people are afraid to talk things out - you know, how racism is? Then issues like the ones above can't be looked at and dealt with. Then nothing ever changes. It's important to have everyone's views heard, how else can we collectively learn as a society?

I'd love to hear your thoughts.